The Great Gay Pick-Up

I am going to preface this story by saying that this has nothing to do with food, rather, it is something that I find rather humorous. The story of how my best friend and I picked up a gay flight attendant is a roller coaster from start to finish, but probably one of my favorite ones to tell.

It all got started when my best friend, Andi, and another friend of ours, we will call her Jane, all came to my house on one of my days off. I’m not sure what our original plan was, probably just hanging out watching TV, non-the-less we decided it would be fun to dress up and go to Mad Myrna’s. Now let me explain a little bit about Mad Myrna’s, it is most likely the only gay bar in Anchorage and hosts a killer drag show on the weekends. The place is always packed, people of all orientations show up to watch Drag Queens perform their numbers and twerk better than I would ever be able to. Now this particular trip was my first experience of any kind with a drag show, and boy was it memorable. We reached the club in the middle of a performance and promptly ordered drinks, in retrospect I should have been keeping track of how much my two friends were drinking, but I was the driver so was letting them have some fun. Miraculously enough there were a couple of chairs available at a table with another patron, we asked if they were being saved and soon enough had the last seats in the house. And that kids, is how we met John.

The rest of the night was spent in good cheer, with drinks and one dollar bills being tucked into various items of clothing. Performers sang incredibly inappropriate versions of popular songs, twerked while in a handstand, and pulling a surprise penis squirt gun from the only place that makes sense.  OH! Sidebar, one of my favorite performers is a Drag King named Hank who hosts the shows regularly, a quality performer with an amazing sense of humor. We are friends on Facebook. Andi actually stuck money down the King’s pants without realizing that there was nothing (i.e. a penis) in said pants, long story short, my friend didn’t know that this dude was actually a girl in fantastic make-up. I never let her forget it or let her live it down. We have gone back a few times since the night currently in question, and without a doubt Hank is still our favorite part of the show.

Now back to your regularly scheduled program. Throughout the night we got to know John fairly well, he was a sweet guy in town for a long layover and we bonded over our miserable love lives. The four of us had fun cheering on performers and John gave us dollar bills to tip those that really impressed us (we were wholly unprepared). Jane, as it turns out, is a regular to the show and was name dropped by the secondary host for humors sake. To conclude the show the performers all line up on the stage and everyone can take pictures with the ladies. The sequence of events is still unclear to me, but Jane switched shoes with a Queen and Andi groped said Drag Queen’s boobs (with consent). I am so sorry, I truly thought that picture evidence existed.

After the show it became obvious that Jane was too drunk to function, so before things could escalade anymore we decided it would be a good idea to head out. Before we left we offered to give John a ride back to his hotel, the caveat? He had to help us get our drunk friend into her house. That particular task turned out to be much more difficult than originally anticipated, but having a guy there to help get her up the stairs was more than a little valuable. After that we took our time getting John back to his hotel, loud music and talking for a few minutes before parting ways. We stopped so John could pick up some cigarettes because his mysteriously vanished. (Later my mom found them wedged between the seats of her car, I ended up not having the heart to throw them away.) And he adorably tucked my car’s block heater cable back into the grill wondering why there was a power cable sticking out of my car. Before he left John made sure that we both had his number and friended him on Facebook, and we set up a chat between him Andi and I. As the two of us drove away from John’s hotel we started cracking up in disbelief of the fact that the first stranger either of us had “picked up” was a very gay man who soon started calling us his “Alaskan Girls”.

Interlude

I haven’t written in while, about two years too long actually. I have changed a lot since I first posted my stories, so much so that I am still figuring out who I am, what type of person I am. Many things have happened in my life since I last posted that have shaped me into someone I am still learning more about. I have moved cross-country twice, and started twice as many jobs. I graduated with my degree, but still cannot figure out what to do with that piece of paper. And I lost a dear friend of mine, someone who was a bright and wonderful soul gone far, far too soon. But I don’t want to write about any of that, instead I will write about how my best friend and I picked up a gay flight attendant at a drag show!

Sweets of Summer: Coconut Macaroons

This week I decided to try out Coconut Macaroons, something new for me. An incredibly easy way to make some delicious treats on a hot summer day. The recipe was easy enough to follow, as long as you have an electronic mixer. My little handheld worked just fine and I had no problems getting the egg whites the right texture. Keep in mind that you don’t want to over mix the egg whites into the coconut, the mixture will turn a little soupier than necessary and melt. The only problem that I ran into was that my cookie scoop might be a little large for macaroons so I would try making them just a little smaller. Keep an eye on them and take them out of the oven right when they start to brown, they will cook quickly as soon as they do brown and can change the overall color. The taste was great; the sweet coconut really satisfied my sweet tooth. However, they don’t really keep very well so don’t plan too far ahead for when you will bake them. We are hardwired to associate the taste of coconut with tropical getaways and summer happiness so these little bites made the perfect summer sweet. All-in-all these sweets were well enjoyed and a recipe to be saved.

Sweets of Summer: Orange Dreamsicle

I have discovered a lot about myself in this little experiment, first and foremost, not everything I bake turns out the way I expect. There are a lot of different factors that could play into this, my oven belonging in the prehistoric era, or a recipe that just doesn’t work. I think that this was the case for the Orange Dreamsicle Cookies I tried to make last week. The idea was a fun one, orange flavored cookie dough with vanilla chips to create a taste reminisce of the popular popsicle. It was easy to make the actual cookie, but baking was a little bit of an issue. The bottoms browned then burned way too quickly, the middle of the cookies were still raw when I took them out of the oven and I could not get them off of the pan. After some trial and error, adjusting the oven temperature and moving the oven racks around a bit, I finally had one cookie sheet of halfway decent cookies. I still don’t know if the Tang in the cookies is what caused the bottoms to burn, but I found out that if you put the racks a little higher in the oven and lower the temperature by about 25 degrees then it should cook right. I can attest that the taste of cookies was great, if not a little unusual, you just have to be in the mood for something a little odd in order to really enjoy these cookies. I’m not sure if I would make these again, as fun as they were they were frustrating for me, not to mention the cleanup was a pain. So I will have to keep on my search for the perfect summer treat.

Sweets of Summer: Lime Sandwich Cookies with Blueberry Filling

I have a confession; I have been slacking off lately and am a week behind schedule. I am fully willing to blame two things; first, it has been incredibly hot and the idea of turning on my oven in my little house with no air conditioning is not pleasant. Second, I am in my final week of class and I have a ten page paper on Shakespeare and Women looming over my head. But finally I made cookies! They just happened to not turn out. This week I tried to make lime cookies with a blueberry frosting filling. The initial recipe that kept cropping up all over the internet was an eggless lime sugar cookie. Absolutely the first thing I noticed is that the dough was way too sticky. I ended up adding almost another half cup of flour in order to maintain the right consistency to chill and roll out the dough. After that it seemed to go smoothly, I baked the cookies for a little over twelve minutes, I took them out right before they started to brown. While I let them cool I undertook the icing, which was easy enough to make. Note: make sure that you have extra powdered sugar. The combination of butter and cream cheese makes the mixture rather soupy until you add some extra powdered sugar. I put it all together and was immediately disappointed. The cookies were rock hard. Eventually, after much internal discourse, I decided that this particular recipe just didn’t work. I think that just regular sugar cookies with a splash or two of lime juice would function just as well. I deemed the cookies inedible, and I had a ton of icing left over. My final verdict? The icing pairs really well with Graham Crackers.

My not so appetizing cookies.

Hooked on a Feeling!

So get this, I’m not writing about food this time. Instead I will be writing about just a movie, or rather 17 minutes of a movie. I had the opportunity to go to a screening of the upcoming Marvel film The Guardians of the Galaxy, and it was awesome! While we had no context to the scene that we watched there was one element that I really enjoyed as a wanna-be movie critic. The movie does an excellent job establishing the characters and creating a working dynamic between the characters. For me there is nothing more annoying than a flat character, so to have five main characters each with their own depth is incredibly important. Also, the quick banter between the group is not only entertaining, but binding as well, we see them grow as a group. The action sequence is equal parts humor and amazing stunts (mostly on Zoe Saldana’s part), making for a fast paced scene that doesn’t distract us from the goal of the scene. In turn, the visuals are stunning, the time that the production team has taken to create the Galaxy is well worth it. All-in-all this 17 minute taste has left me wanting more and incredibly excited for the premiere. In fact, this will be one of the first movies that I buy tickets in advance for. I have high hopes for this movie, and the faith that it will live up to my expectations.

Film/Food(Drinks): The Monuments Men

The first installment of my Film/food(drinks) series will be focusing on The Monuments Men and French Food. The Monuments Men is a 2014 film directed and featuring George Clooney based on true events of WWII. Parts of the movie is based in Paris, thus why I chose to attempt French Food. On the menu tonight is Soupe a l’Oignon au Fromage, Ratatouille, and Tarte Tatin all paired with Chateau du Haut-Queray Bordeaux. Forgive me, I am cheap, therefore my wine is cheap.

First; the film. Quick disclaimer, I love this movie. The genre, historical drama with equal parts humor and heartwarming/feel good emotions, is right up my alley, but this movie isn’t for everyone. Sometimes the pacing was a little slow, but it is understandable to try and highlight the important series of events that are happening. This movie has some interesting style choices, one of which being the narration. Most of story is told through the perspective of George Clooney’s character. However there is a point in the movie where another character takes the stage through the voice of his letter. It is an interesting style choice, just like the ending. While I will never spoil a movie I will say that the ending was unusual but powerful in a way that we can all relate to. This movie is definitely on my list of DVDs to buy and share as I go!

I discovered a lot about myself while trying to cook dinner. The most glaringly obvious being that I apparently cannot cook French Food. First off, apparently I need to work on slicing my vegetables a little thinner, there must be some secret that I am not privy to. The recipes themselves were easy enough to follow, but I was fighting my instincts to add extra spices. The Soupe turned out well I would like to think, I may try out some other recipes though just to insure I am doing it right. Meanwhile, the Ratatouille did not turn out at all like I expected. While I will admit that I forgot the tomatoes I am not sure how much of a difference it would have made esthetically. Although, the taste had nothing to do with the appearance, I was really surprised that the natural flavors of the vegetables played well off of each other and was very pleasant. I would still recommend trying out different recipes and finding one that fits you. Overall the Bordeaux paired well with the food, even as cheap as it was; however, a better wine would work wonders. The Tarte Tatin was the most difficult, mostly because I was trying to improvise with what I made the Tarte in. Again it felt odd to use the minimal ingredients, but the natural flavors of the apples make a delicious dessert. I enjoyed trying out different foods, as challenging as it was, and I look forward to the next challenge!

French Onion Soup

Film/Food(Drinks): An Introduction

As I am sure you can infer, I love food. And TV shows, and movies (of course Netflix by proxy). One of my favorite past times is to cook dinner and watch a movie. Me being me, I decided to take this one step further. On a regular basis, hopefully at least somewhat regularly, I will be watching a fairly recent movie and making something I have never made before all while reviewing both movie and recipe. Also, I will be trying to create a themed meal based on the location (or best guess) to make it a little bit more fun! At the recommendation of my best friend, known as Kate throughout my blog, I am also going to pair a wine or another alcoholic drink with the meal in order to get the “full experience”. I’m looking forward to this little experiment and hope that you all enjoy it as well! To be continued . . .

Reno Food Truck Fridays!

Food Truck Fridays. I cannot tell you how many Fridays I have been disappointed to be at work or otherwise engaged. But now I can finally go, my only worry is that I will get full too quickly. Every first and third Friday of the month the Reno Food Truck gather downtown for fun and merriment. My first experience with a Food Truck was not until after I moved to Reno and was dragged by friend. My small town in Alaska didn’t have much of a demographic for these venues. Anchorage itself didn’t have these small, portable options for food; barring the carts outside of the courthouse or at the fair. As a result of my inexperience with these trucks I was amazed and overwhelmed to see a couple dozen trucks gathered at a local park. I really didn’t know what to expect, but it certainly wasn’t this. Walking up I heard live music and laughter, families were spread out on the expansive lawn watching a local Reno artist perform. The smell of food wafted over to us well before we actually saw the line-up of food. There was a little bit of everything, trucks with restaurants backing them to original businesses; fried everything to vegan wraps.

First, there was the well-known BoDawgs, a regular fixture on the college campus. Their dawgs are soaked in their special sauce and you have total control over your toppings. I tried, and loved, my dawg with Bodacious sauce, mayo, pineapple, and the pickled pink onions. The last bite of the dawg is a mixture of pleasure and disappointment, disappointment of no more food. Next is the Electric Blue Elephant, a vegan-friendly option, where I had their sesame-sunflower curry wrap. This wrap was surprisingly fulfilling and filled with a wide variety of vegetables, the only downside is that it is incredibly messy to eat. We then got something to drink at the lemonade stand, freshly squeezed strawberry-lemonade, nothing would have been more refreshing. The grand finale came in the form of cheesecake, cheesecake topped with lavender honey. While a bit overpriced the dessert itself was rich and a nice way to wrap up the evening.

I learned a lot this trip, first, Reno residents love their local food. Second, food truck culture is more popular than I thought. Finally, I should really invest in a folding chair, people will stare at you if you suddenly jump off the grass and away from a spider. Overall I had a blast and hope to make this a regular event that I attend. And who knows, Reno folks, I may see you there!!

BoDawgs!

Sweets of Summer: Pink Lemonade Cookies

The first recipe that I decided to try for my Sweets of Summer series was a Pink Lemonade Cookie recipe from Better Homes and Gardens. I was genuinely surprised at the wide variety of recipes that make this cookie, and each one was vastly different. In fact, the first two that I selected were actually the instructions for a box mix that is somewhere out there. After a little bit of looking, and unfortunately reading the comments to these recipes, I just got frustrated and picked the first one from a source that I have heard of. The recipe itself if fairly simple, the only ingredient that I did not have in my kitchen was the pink lemonade concentrate. Making the cookies were easy enough, I would recommend adding a couple of drops of red food coloring to make the cookies look the right shade of pink.  As far as the actual baking goes, you will need a couple of extra minutes in the oven to cook the cookies all of the way through. Keep a close eye on the bottom of the cookies though, the top won’t brown at all, but the bottom will darken quickly especially if you use a dark cookie sheet. When you ice the cookies don’t skimp on how much to use, this icing will go a long way. As far as the taste goes the icing is what really makes the cookie, I added a couple extra teaspoons of lemonade concentrate to the icing and I would highly recommend doing the same. The cookies themselves were just a little bland; I would probably add some extra concentrate or maybe some lemon juice to really up the ante on flavor. If you need to thicken the dough after the extra juice I would use sugar instead of flour, just to make them a little sweeter in the long run. Overall these are good cookies, light enough to eat in the stifling heat without feeling like I am just getting hotter. It is a relief to know that there are options to satisfying my sweet tooth this summer, and I am looking forward to trying out even more new things.

Pink Lemonade Cookies